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TRUTH
May these words of my mouth and this meditation of my heart be pleasing in your sight, Lord, my Rock and my Redeemer.
Psalms 19:14
REFLECTION
I reach ephemerally toward fulfillment rather than reflectively toward direction.
That’s what got me in trouble to begin with, and that’s what still threatens my well-being.
It’s the age-old quandary of seeking after something long and hard only to finally get it and realize it does not fulfill. In fact, quite the opposite: once acquired, we’re emptier than before.
I want to want the right things.
I want to seek first the kingdom and goodness and all that.
But I keep getting in my own way. I keep getting distracted by my own desires.
And usually they’re just that—distractions.
The key is a willingness to conform to God’s will for me. But that’s easy to say and hard to wrap my thoughts and actions around.
The reason I’m so easily distracted by the things around me are because they’re candy. It is a simple and acceptable thing to flit around like a bird living on little specs of worldly candy.
They satisfy for a moment and then it’s on to the next one.
In God we have a challenge. We have substance, but it’s not easy or as glamorous. It’s not the dopamine we have conditioned ourselves to live by, it’s the steady flow of living water that can sustain us if we stay with it.
It’s the only way I’ve found that resembles the lifeline peace that has a real foundation. And that’s only with my limited and usually childlike experience with it so far.
God, give me courage to stay on target.
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NEXT
When you’re ready, here are some tools for you:
Book List (amazon link)
Some of my favorite reads related to recovery and/or wrestling with faith.4th Step Guide (free download)
A PDF with instructions and worksheets for a thorough 4th step. Straight from the Big Book. Fearlessness not included.12-Step Christianity (YouTube)
My thoughts on the parallels between discipleship and sponsorship.
KEEP LEANING FORWARD
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