Ego Tripping

flushing it out

Eamonn Cottrell
January 06, 2025

For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.

Isaiah‬ ‭55‬:‭9

I’d do well to remember my place in the universe more often.

Given enough time and focus, my thoughts and plans can take up infinitely more real estate in my head than they should.

I can begin to think they are ultimate.

I begin to rely on them to guide me through my days.

I begin to think that the ease and comfort I’m getting from them can and will last.

I begin to look for eternity in the wrong place.

Again.

This is the slipstream that I live in without God.

This is the mind-trap I succumb to without even realizing it.

Addiction throws jet fuel on the fire, but it’s not the root of it. That is deeper.

My problem is my obsession with myself.

It manifests in good times and bad. It’s there, underneath my motivations, guiding my words and intentions and positioning.

The only relief I’ve found—and I’m bad at doing this consistently—is in the surrender of myself.

Turning over the things and circumstances and conditions that I think will make me happy and instead, asking for new eyes to see the truth.

It doesn’t mean that all the things I want are bad.

Most of the time it’s good things that are simply taking up a disproportionate amount of space in my mind.

Edging God out.

That’s dangerous.

God, help me edge out myself.

When you’re ready, here are some tools for you:

Book List (amazon link)
Some of my favorite reads related to recovery and/or wrestling with faith.
4th Step Guide (free download)
A PDF with instructions and worksheets for a thorough 4th step. Straight from the Big Book. Fearlessness not included.
12-Step Christianity (YouTube)
My thoughts on the parallels between discipleship and sponsorship.

Cheers, Eamonn
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